Retired, bored and broke in the empty nest — ideas?
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My Boomer Tips
I know someone who's retired, and she sits around the house all day, doing not much except watching TV and reading. She gets bored, but she doesn't have the money to go out and do anything (even gas money). And now, she's feeling the empty-nest syndrome, 'cause she's devoted her whole life to being a mom, and with nobody at home to mother, she's feeling very sad and alone. She doesn't like the group politics of the nearby senior centers, and working was taking too much of a toll on her health, so going back to work isn't an option.
I see her or call her when I can, but that isn't often enough. What can I do? What can I suggest to help her?
Lots of great suggestions here.
Volunteer to read to the Blind.
Crafts? does she like to sew? Perhaps she could start by making simple things, i.e. square, or even flat round pillows. Take pictures of them, build a portfolio, show to friends and family. Who knows – it could turn into a home business.
Take a walk around the area and pick wildflowers. Even wild flower arrangement-arrange, take pictures, create a pictorlal journal. Doing that may bolster her self-esteem, confidence and self-pride. It’s gratifying seeing something you’ve made, completed. I’ve done that, just to enjoy the different wild flowers available.
Retirement can be boring…or it can be the start of an entirely new dimension. The bottom line: your time is now your own, to structure in any way you choose.
Good luck to your friend.
I’ve been retired for 6 years and the "nest" has been empty for 10 years,so I know how your friend feels. My income is limited and my biggest entertainment is going to the mall and walking around or getting on the bus and going to the library or the courthouse. Both are free and legal. I’ve also comtemplated being a volunteer in a hospital or Walmart. If your friend is in moderate good health,would she consider taking a little job in a fast food place or a book store? There really are a lot of things to do out there,even if it’s just walking and smiling at another lonely soul.
Could she learn to use the internet and come here and join us?
Your friend might be the perfect candidte to be a foster mom — for pets. There are many foster programs out there were cats and dogs are placed in foster homes until they are adopted. It would certainly offer something to focus on, these programs generally pay a stipend as well as cover vet costs, so it could be a win-win-win situation. My mother fostered some cats after my father died, and it really helped her stay alive and vital.
How about going back to school or starting a new hobby? Working from home or starting a small home based business could bring her extra cash and the luxury of making her own hours.
Her children should do something to help her, but it is nice of you to want to help. Maybe she could take a foster child in or babysit for someone during the day. Needlework may be a good idea if she can embroidery, or some type of handiwork. Crossword puzzles keep the mind agile.
i knew of a woman like that but she had a sister she would phone from time to time and that sister would send her sewing material and thread to keep her busy making things. I do pencil drawings because the cardboard I work on comes from the grocery store and costs me less than a dollar, plus it takes me a very long time to complete a drawing. Yes, when there isn’t much money to go around people end up watching tv and maybe having their neighbor stop by. She could go for a walk, but some of the tv programs could keep her mind active. Her kids should contribute to buying her a laptop and providing the dialup or connection so that she could see their kids via skype and send email pictures to keep in touch. She could also be playing games on the internet like Farmville or stay in touch with family on Facebook. She could also play cards like solitaire. She could buy a lottery ticket a couple of times a month. She could also watch church programs on Sunday. Maybe she would like someone from her family take her to lunch after church once a month or more. Do people remember her birthday or share holidays with her?
Perhaps a puppy would help get her out and give her comfort. Maybe she could look after one while the owners go on holiday for a few dollars. Or conversation english for someone that has come from a non English speaking background. If she doesn’t have a computer then that’s a shame as a computer could open up a new world for her. Maybe she can get together with other seniors who are learning, Im in a similar position but not as bad Ive learnt the computer I could spend more time with my Grandchildren but when I feel good is when I’ve been for a good walk. i dont like the effort of going for the walk but once I have I feel great.
Suggest that she come here. Suggest that she look into volunteering to help others in some way. It makes a person feel much better if they can do something to help others. Can she join a church and get into some activities there?
It sounds like she may be depressed. Being with other people can help a lot, but you may have your hands full, getting her out of the house.
I went through empty nest when I was in my late 40s. That’s when I gathered up my gumption and found a job that I really enjoyed. Spent the next 17 years happily working with other people. Retired now, I have found several things to do that keep me with other people.
If she is able she could get a job, part-time or full-time as a private sitter. Someone I know did that, she wasn’t able to do much physical work due to a medical condition but she truly loved to be a private sitter, she was very caring and compassionate. I have known 3 different people who retired and did that to help supplement their retirement. Maybe she could get the word out and do some odd sitting jobs for people, her reputation will grow as a compassionate and trust-worthy person and she will get more.
She may not have allot of gas money but going to a shopping center, a park or just walking around the neighborhood on nice days can help you meet people. Has she tried to sell Avon. It won’t make her a fortune contrary to the adds, but when I sold it, I delivered books to several streets on the weekend mornings and met so many nice people. There are inexpensive hobbies she can do at home. Planting a garden. large or small or even house plants. Spray painting and old frame for pictures. fixing something in the house, changing a room around. baking goodies for the neighbors. None of these cost allot of money and it keeps you busy. If her children can come over, have a pot luck so the cost of the entire meal doesn’t fall on her.
Being broke, the children gone and short on money is where I am at, but I still am working. I do what I can afford to do around the house, It keeps me busy and I always have ideas of what I would like to do.